2. Respond, Not React

It is essential that we understand the difference between responding and reacting. While we respond, we evaluate with a calm mind and do whatever is most appropriate. We are in control of our actions. But when we react, we end up doing what the other person wants us to do. In this context, Premji recalls, as a youth ‘reacting’ to orders he did not resort to rebelling. “Rebellion as a reaction is conformity to something else,” he says thoughtfully.

Oftentimes, when it comes to negative criticisms, he notes reflecting on his experiences, we make the mistake of reacting rather than responding. We must always welcome any form of criticism, for, as the story below illustrates, it helps us better ourselves.

A boy enrolled in an art school dreamt of becoming a great artist. His aspiration however was pulverized by his teacher who would always find some fault with his work. The student improved on his work continuously, hoping that one day he would hear a word of appreciation from his teacher. But it never happened. Finally, in disgust, he bought a painting from an accomplished artist, touched it up with fresh paint and showed it to his teacher. The teacher smiled and said, “Now this is really good work. Congratulations.” Feeling guilty, the student confessed that it was not his painting. The teacher looked at him for a while and said, “Till now, I thought you wanted to paint a great picture. But I realize now that you do not seek any further improvement; it means that the last painting you did was the best you will ever do. Remember you have set these limits to your talent, not me.”

“As we see here,” says Premji, “criticism may actually be an expression of faith in us rather than a means of putting us down.” If we react rather than respond to criticisms, we will only be limiting ourselves.