I knew Jatin from high school in Baroda, and we went to the M.S University together. Jatin’s family came from East Africa while we had been in Baroda for generations. Baroda lead to the U.S., and I came to Duquesne in Pittsburgh, while Jatin went to the University of Iowa. We had gotten engaged before this venture to the U.S., which I guess did a great deal for our relationship. We got married after I completed my M.S and joined Jatin in Iowa to do my Ph.D., and two years later he moved off to join Bristol Meyers-Squibb in Indiana! For the next year, we drove across the 400-odd miles every other weekend, as I finished my thesis off-campus. I then joined American Home Products in New Jersey. Now, when I look back on those years, I am amazed at how we managed to work so far apart, and yet be so close. Thanks to U.S. Air, our favorite friend, Jatin flew out every fortnight to be with me. Finally, his company shifted the R&D out of Indiana to New Jersey in 1994 and we could plan to settle down.

Some time later, my company moved its R&D to Virginia and I had to choose between moving along with them and looking out for a new job. I spruced up my resume and went into the market. It didn’t help that I was pregnant too. A couple offers went on hold, and I realized that many didn’t feel comfortable with a mother-to-be. When the Johnson & Johnson offer came up, I took on a different tack. I made it clear to them that if they were looking for someone who could come in and start working up to speed the next day, I was not the one. But if they wanted somebody who knew what it took to transfer technology from lab to production, I could help them…pregnant or not. I joined J&J as a bench-level scientist, which demanded some travel. And promptly, in 3 weeks, I went in to deliver our daughter. A new job, a newborn…it couldn’t get any easier.

I went back to work in six weeks, and then began the first of my travels. It began with local day trips and Jatin and I managed this well. And slowly, my trips grew to extend over a day, and stretched to a couple weeks at a time, as travel grew to outside of the continental U.S. We moved out of our house and into an apartment near my mother’s. The one trap I didn’t fall into was to assuage my guilt by buying my daughter loads of inane gifts. Instead, I bought her stuff that she could share with her classmates: games that made her seek company and interact with her friends. And for her, even small things like shampoo bottles and mints from the hotels I stayed at became exciting trivia. I think this built a wonderful sense of appreciation and sharing in her.

As Meghnee grew older, I managed to slow up the travel, as my job grew less hands-on and more strategic. But the demands were still there, as the products I handle at J&J are over-the-counter and thus have very short lifecycles. Jatin, on the other hand, works on product lines that have a longer lead-time. When Meghnee was six, we had another child, a son, Lakshay, last year.

I tend to plan a lot. I think my job has given me that good habit. And it helps us become better prepared for emergencies. I try and get to work early and get home early, so that I can spend quality time with my kids when they are awake. I am well challenged on the job and at home. I think I have put some of my personal priorities on the backburner for a bit. Its time will come. Right now, I find it important to balance my work and family. I will find Kalpana’s personal demands in a while. In that, I am happy.